So when we last left our hero and heroine, she had just woken him up to send him to work. Ok so maybe not hero or heroine, just two people who found themselves in a difficult situation. After I woke Raven up, I pulled the gate shut to finish count. For those of you who don't know Corrections officers count all inmates at least 6 times a day, sometimes more. There are big gates that are locked shut to keep the two sides of the dorms apart during count. So when count was cleared I went to the D side to open up the gate. There he stood. We barely said two words. I was thinking all kinds of things, what had he done to get here? Was he married? A million and one questions flashed in my mind. Yet in that instance I knew, looking into those beautiful dark eyes, I knew. He wasn't married. He was already mine. Now that is what my soul told me. Let me tell you what my head told me. Girl what are you thinking. He is an inmate. You are a Corrections officer. Not only is it against the rules, but it's against the law. Depending on how far you take it. We did our best to ignore each other for the next month. He worked in the kitchen, who am I kidding. He ran the kitchen, inmates and free staff alike listened to what he told them to do in the kitchen. He can cook. He cooked for the other inmates and he cooked for the Officers Dinning Hall. Since he was always allowed to have sharp objects to cook with he pretty much had a c/o assigned to him. Someone to watch and make sure the sharps where always accounted for. The prison was always forcing officers to work over time. If you denied overtime you where issued a warning, two warnings and you where fired. So I worked overtime, allot. I would get off shift at the dorm at 6:00 am. The Captain would call and say your held over report to the kitchen. You see both Raven and I believe in the Great Spirit. We both think we where together before this life and will be together after this life. Now if anyone needs proof, we where still trying to avoid each other when I was assigned to the kitchen on day shift for overtime. I was the cook babysitter. Thats what we called the officer who's job it was to watch Raven. No chance of avoidance here.
Now Raven is Apache, so he goes on vision quests. These are days with fasting and prayers where he asks the Great Spirit to show him what direction his life should be taking. He went on a vision quest not to long after I came to work in the kitchen. I was averaging 4 days of overtime in the kitchen. On his second day he walked up to me and said "woman get out of my head." Now considering we haven't said to much to each other. This statement spoke volumes. He was thinking of me as much as I was thinking of him. I dreamed of him at night, every night. So when he said that all I could think was "yea and you need to get out of my dreams" We still did our best to keep away. Except now I would notice him watching me. I would try to watch him also. We where sinking.
I am married. Have been for 21 years but that's another story. I had been separated for 3 months when I met Raven. I didn't want to get involved with anyone much less an inmate. My husband (soon to be ex) felt something change. He had an uncanny sense that I was interested in someone else. He came over to my apartment to ask me to come home. I said no. He even said he would get rid of his girlfriend. I said no. He became enraged. We argued, he slapped me and grabbed my arms just above my elbows and shook me like a child. The next day I was standing in the kitchen of the prison, thinking. A hundred miles away; not good when your on duty. Raven brought me some food and said I needed to eat. I said I wasn't hungry to go back to work. I wasn't sounding very nice when I said it. He put the food down and wanted to know if he could ask me a question. I said sure, why not. He had seen my grandson and my husband at the appreciation dinner, how could I work so many hours, didn't my husband want me at home? I told him it wasn't any of his business. He had to push. You have a nice family why don't you stay home? I told him things aren't always what they seem. This time I was pissed I told him in my best c/o voice Go to work--and I pointed. My bruises where visible below my uniform sleeve. The look on his face broke my heart. He took my arm, ran his thumb over the bruises on one arm, while reaching for the other arm. With both arms in his hands, he looked at me and said "come August, I am going to break your husbands heart" I never expected that. A threat maybe, but not what I thought it would be. That was the first time Raven touched me. The first but not the last time that he proved he was not like other inmates, or even like other men. We started talking then. When we first said we loved each other is not all that important, what is important is our souls recognized each other and no matter how we fought against what they wanted, we lost.
Yet we won. We talked more in those short months then I have spoken with anyone in my life. He is smart, funny, fierce protective, loving and sexy. He makes me laugh. We started writing to one another. The letters where heaven. I read them over and over again.
Things changed, I hated my job, hated the way c/o's treated inmates. yes they broke the law, yes they had to pay. But did they have to be treated like animals. Yes, according to my fellow c/o they did. Not only that but just because they cared about the prisoners, so did the family members. I hated it. I treated the guys with respect. Made them obey the rules but still treated them like humans. That was my downfall. You see when your female and you treat the inmates with anything but disdain, you become a target. A target to be shot at by c/o's and by other inmates who want something from you.
There was fighting on the street, I put two inmates in the hole (segregation). They told the investigator that Raven seemed too preoccupied with me. Too happy. They started watching us. They intercepted some letters from us. I was called into the office. I didn't even respond to the accusations, I just resigned. Already had it in my pocket. My only regret is that I wasn't able to say goodbye to Raven. They walked me out that night.
They went and got Raven, five corrections officers and the Lt. he knew something bad had happened. Raven doesn't know how to dodge questions. He tells the truth, every-time, all the time. They asked him if we where involved. He said yes, he loved me. We where going to be together when he made parole in August of 2004. They threw him in the hole, left him there for 3 months, told him I turned him in. He knew better. I love him and he loves me.
